HOW TO HANDLE FAMILY MEMBERS DURING THE HOLIDAYS

The holidays are approaching! And you know what that means…family visits! Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, but it used to be one that I dreaded with a passion.

Many will hear the following questions and/or comments from at least one family member:

1.      When are you getting married?

2.      When are you having kids?

3.      You sure got bigger from when I last saw you! Look at that/those (insert body part here).

When you haven’t seen family in a while, they are quick to talk about how you’ve changed. In Caribbean households, family members are quick to talk about how fat you’ve gotten. Now you’re afraid to get that extra helping of turkey or sweet potato pie because you’re self-conscious and afraid someone is going to say something.

The holiday season is a time to give thanks, spread love and good cheer, and eat good food. Thanksgiving and Christmas only comes once a year. As we’ve seen in the past two years, life is too short. Don’t let family get the best of you!

Here’s a few tips on how to handle family members with no filter so they don’t ruin your holidays:

1.      Ignore them-pretend you don’t hear them. Smile with your sexy self, then walk away.

2.      Respond with a compliment-say “It’s great seeing you too” and politely mention a change you see on them and be positive. It takes the attention off you.

3.      Change the topic-as crazy as this may sound, talk about a taboo topic like politics or religion. This will cause debate and again, take the attention off you to the point that family member may forget they had something to say about you in the first place. Involve other family members so you can walk away once you get tired.

4.      Show out-respond by saying, “That means there’s just more of me to love” and if you like, twirl or strut like you’re walking the runway. You read that right. Show out!

It’s important you take control of the conversation. When family members see you cannot be moved, they won’t do it again.

To those reading who is that family member: If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all. No one knows the impact a comment (even if it was meant to be funny) can make so PLEASE think before you speak. You never know what someone is going through, so be kind always.

I hope you all have a joyous and drama-free holiday season. Enjoy the last few weeks of 2022!